I had a long conversation with Hattie recently about tattoos. She said she’d actually spoken face-to-face with a woman who told her tattoos were “for hookers and white trash.”
I read a web page this year by a woman who urged other women considering getting tattoed to be extremely careful where they put their body art, so that they could hide it when necessary because they would without a doubt be discriminated against because of it.
Today, I read a blog entry by a guy whose own mother told him his tattoo was white trash, and he was over 30 when he got it.
I have women friends who recount varied tales of sex discrimination in the workplace, and in companies I’ve personally worked for myself. I’ve heard tales of women being shut out of jobs or opportunities by men who wanted to keep them for themselves.
And all of this, quite frankly, baffles me. I feel like I live on a different planet than the rest of these people.
I honestly can’t remember a single time I’ve ever gotten a “shut up, you’re just a woman” vibe in my entire life. I’ve never had any problems with male customers refusing to listen to me or work with me because I’m female.
I’ve never had anyone ever give me attitude or even dirty looks because of my tattoos. I’ve never even met anyone who had a strong negative reaction to my ink. Or my piercings (I have my nose pierced).
People tell me these kinds of discrimination exist, and it’s not like I don’t believe them, but I’ve never once experienced sexual discrimination in my entire professional life, and I’ve been working since I was sixteen. I’ve never been shut out, refused a promotion, or even strongly condescended to (for the latter case, if I was I never felt that it was sex based. Some people are just condescending fucks, and that’s that. It doesn’t have to be a sex role issue).
Of course I’ve had personal issues with co-workers over the years, but I never interpreted it as being due to my sex.
I’ve worked blue collar jobs and white collar jobs. I’ve worked in warehouses lifting boxes alongside men, I’ve worked in offices with men, I once did my own valve lash adjustment and I’m quite capable of doing basic maintenence on a vehicle, and I currently work in a building full of Internet geeks who are all men – I’m the only woman in this department. And while most of them will hold the door for me if we happen to arrive at it at the same time, none of them have ever doubted my ability, intellect, or competence.
Yesterday a customer came in to pick up a NIC card. He was male, older than me, and we had a long conversation about installing the card (I explained how to do it) and about his network problems (I explained all the possible reasons for the symtoms his network was having). I was clearly the expert in the situation, and I was clearly educating him. I got absolutely no vibe off of him. He was, like every customer I’ve ever dealt with since I became an Internet engineer, attentive and polite.
Which leads me to karma. I mean, clearly I do live on the same green earth as these people who get shit for their tattoos and these women who have had to fight tooth and nail for the right to do the same job a man does only better, but it’s none of it ever happened to me.
This is where the brilliant conclusion would go, if I had one. But I don’t. Sorry. I just think it’s interesting that wherever you go, there you are. (I get my ass totally kicked in other areas, so it’s not like I think I’m special.)
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Why can’t I see everyone else’s comments? Sniff. Oh well. Anyway, I was disappointed about not getting a brilliant conclusion, but happy to hear that you’ve never had to beat down anyone that stood in your way of trying to get your job done, much less getting a job in the first place. You go girl! 🙂 Course now I want to see a picture of you… must look around the site and see if you broke the blog rules like I did and put one up. I have dreams of getting a spikey haircut, dying it bright red, getting a little nose ring and moving to London. Sigh… until then, I am super soccer mom with “The Preppy Handbook” on her shelf. Bahaha.
Wait. Tattoos aren’t white trash? Bawahahahahahahahahahaha
j/k….or not….(snort!)
You’re just a girl, what do you know…
THANK you, Bucket!
I’d like to think the “tattoos are for white trash” opinion is fading fast, but of course it’s still true that “only whores and little children wear red shoes.” Right?
;-P
I certainly hope so!
And one mustn’t wear white shoes or carry a white purse before Easter, either.
…or after Labor Day. 😉
I’ve only had two experiences (aside from working in a warehouse, where incoming drivers would occassionally treat me like I couldn’t handle cartons or treat me like I didn’t know anything).
The first was this past spring, when I was buying a fridge. *I* was buying a fridge. The sales guy kept talking to Chris about different features of the fridge, as if he had to convince him to buy the thing, when I had told him exactly what *I* wanted in the fridge *I* was buying. Never spoke to me directly.
…and then there’s the vocalist in Chris’ band right now, who won’t even make eye contact with me. I’ve been told that my tattoos and massive intellect intimidate him, but – YOU KNOW when someone’s intimidated by you vs when they just really don’t care if you’re there or not. This annoys me mostly because IT’S IN MY OWN HOME.
-bit of karma-
maybe it’s because my expectations to be treated as an equal are just too darn high for the non-tattooed. (heh)
When you say karma – do you mean that your karma is such that you haven’t had to deal with the “bad karma” of sexual discrimination? I haven’t ever felt particuarly discriminated against either, I’m just wondering why you would attribute it to karma.
I mean, wherever YOU go, there YOU are. As in, if that sex role stuff is your shit, you’ll pull it to you no matter where you are. I’ve worked in companies right next to women I knew who were dealing with discrimination, and I wasn’t dealing with it. I was dealing with other crap. Does that make sense? I don’t mean karma in the sense that if you break it you buy it, I mean more like you manifest your interior issues in the exterior.
I’ve been trying to think of something clever to write for quite a while in response to your brilliant entry. Didn’t come up with it yet. But I know exactly what you mean. I can relate to it as a gay man…as far as I’m aware, I’ve never been discriminated against for being gay, haven’t had anyone gossiping behind my back, or I’ve never experienced any gay bashings. And it’s not just because I work in the arts (although that’s helped me, I’m sure) – I’ve also worked for a church as a part-time secretary, as a secretary for a a very hetero architect, and so on. Plus there’s a lot of other experiences that gay men have that I just don’t seem to attract into my life (thankfully). I don’t think it’s just because I’m naive (far from it). But I too have other experiences I attract that other people don’t, so I’ve definitely got my own shit to work out too. Cool post!
Yes, I think that that, right there, was actually my ‘brilliant conclusion.’ Thank you for writing it for me! 😉