In which the good and the bad are blended into something so astonishingly neutral that I probably could have slept all day and felt just about the same.
Today is my last day at the call center. I am so excited! Change! I’m changing jobs! I’m out of here! This seriously freakin’ rules!
I’ll get to learn and grow and change! This is so excellent!
I packed all my personal crap into a box before I left work last night, so today my desk is spartan and unfamiliar. I was deliberately late because I wanted to panic my supervisor into thinking I wasn’t coming in at all, but my joke backfired: he had to leave early for personal reasons – there’s been a death among his friends.
Then I went through the exit interview, which was little more than a brief chat with a review of the non-compete (I don’t know any trade secrets so I couldn’t spill them even if I wanted to), good luck, and a give-us-your-key-back. They said I can leave an hour early tonight since it’s my last shift. Very exciting! Best day ever!
But when I got back to my desk, Teh [now ex] BF IMed me to say that he’s taking the rest of the day off because he can’t cope.
I guess I sort of wanted today to be more about me, but perhaps that was both selfish and childish. I’m a grown woman; the world isn’t always going to be charmed with and for me when I want it to, I guess.
I feel horrible that Teh [now ex] BF is so uncomfortable with our break-up that he can’t even sit in the same building with me… I feel awful. I also feel a little pissed because I never meant to cause him pain and this is supposed to be a fun day for me, not one where I feel like an asshole all day long because I chased the man out of his own job. He’s been here for eight or nine years; I’ve been here for twenty months.
A brief synopsis of the breakup: A couple of months ago I was overwhelmed and unhappy and pulled back from the relationship. A lot. {{Paragraph redacted at Teh [now ex] BF’s request.}} We broke up two nights ago.
Now I’m sitting here waiting for my last Friday lunch meeting to start, and I’m both so excited and so sorry that the two emotions cancel each other out and I feel… well, just kinda sick.
Maybe I can just have my entire nervous system removed for health reasons. Then I wouldn’t have to feel this weird.
I left my phone at home. I need to go get it on my lunch break so I can call the new job and find out when to show up.
Update: I get a three day weekend! The new job is running a partial-holiday on Monday to honor the 4th, so I don’t start until Tuesday at eight.
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🙁 I’m sorry you feel bad on your last day.
Thanks for being my best girlfriend. I will be calling you….
You had better be calling me, girl. -m
Better to feel happy *and* to feel like shit than to only feel like shit! Sending you more Happy Last Day thoughts and have a great weekend!
*smooches*
T’anks. Vuboqs rule. -m
while i understand why you feel guilty, you don’t have to. a) you were clear about what you want and need; and b) you didn’t do the breaking up, he did. you both want different things in a relationship right now. that’s the way things sometimes go. it would be a whole lot worse for both of you in the future. that he can’t deal is his stuff, not yours. if he’s laying his inability to be in the same work area as you at your feet, then it’s misplaced. it’s still his stuff.
yay! for the new job!! the world does revolve around your right now. i felt the shift, honest!
Thank you. *hugs* Regardless of whose stuff is whose, it still sucks having to be the asshole. -m
he may feel horrible cause your world revolves around YOU now, not him.
and you need time in your world to see how the new job works, do laundry, knit, or blob around in peace and quiet.
{{{{{hugs}}}}} while you explore this exciting new trail in your life journey!
I just think he’s sad; it’s not like he’s an asshole or anything. And yes, doubtless I’ll have more than enough time for the mundane shit now/ Probably too much! -m
hey Huge hugs life is always now so have fun and have a great weekend
Thanks. I’m doing alright. -m
Joe moved out about 4 weeks ago. We broke up. He took his important items. We’ll see how long it takes for him to get the rest. I think that I will have to pack it up and wait. Break ups suck but I feel really free right now and in a good zone. I send you much love.
Wow, I hadn’t heard. (He’s been known to leave stuff at people’s houses for years and then be surprised when he comes back for them and you no longer have them… or won’t give them back.) I’m glad you’re doing well; you sound great and that’s excellent. *hugs* -m
I’m pretty sure I told you that the UNIVERSE DOES revolve around you when you were six. Did you think I was kidding?
To bad about the breakup. 🙁
Never! -m
All of the above and kersmooches to the power of ten!!!
Aw, thanks hon! -m