In which I take a moment to review myself.
Mush, I know you think you’ve got a good excuse for writing such lame content lately ’cause you’re a tad bit depressed, but COME ON! A breakup? That’s great shit! You should be totally inspired! You’re seperated, you’re couch surfing, and you’re, like, college-student broke. How can you not have anything to write about? Aren’t all the best albums break-up albums? Aren’t artists supposed to love the torture?
You glossed right over the sheep & fiber arts festival that NLW took you to last weekend, where you took a drop-spindle class and appeared to possess an innate talent for drafting.
You’ve left out the achingly sweet love and support of your friends, the messages and calls from your brother, the moments of transcendent gratitude. You’ve not said much at all about the ego-grinding process of loss and how you’re beginning to think it isn’t pain that brings one closer to God but gratitude.
You haven’t even touched the sleepless hours you’ve spent lying on AmmZon’s couch staring at the ceiling, wondering if you’re actually the biggest bitch in the world… before realizing that you’re not that special and you’re merely a runner-up. I mean, that’s some imagery there! Sleepless nights! The crickets and the breeze and the noise of being in town after five years in the country. Christ, girl, your posts totally suck compared to what you could be writing!
You haven’t gone into any of the great and gory details, either. You’ve allowed all kinds of angry, dick-slicingly pissed thoughts go without even writing them down or posting them on the Internet! If you’re going to break-up and blog, shouldn’t you be quoting him at his angriest and making him look like a total ogre? Where’s the acrimonious, polysyllabic ranting you used to be famous for?
All in all, I have to give you a C. I mean, it’s good that you’re posting, but damn you’re not doing shit with what you’ve got.
I have no idea why you get 10,000 hits a month, girl, I really don’t.
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aw – take it easy on yerself. some things are meant to be kept private from the internets. allowing yourself time to reflect (or plot revenge) (or mourn) (or whatever) over you&bread is only respectful, to yourself and the relationship you had & have.
so did you get a spindle? didjya? huh? huh??
One of those dowel-and-CD spindles came with the price of the class. It’s ugly, but it’s well-balanced and works well! -m
I disagree. This Is How a Heart Breaks is one of the most heart-wrenching posts, because of its understated tone… surrender. It’s not about anger or hatred or drama; it’s about yielding, and disillusionment, and everything about breaking up that sucks. Hell, it’s easier to dwell on the anger and the drama because it distracts from and dilutes the reality of heartbreak. But you slice through it all and dwell on the real.
Love you, Shenry. -m
Pff, giiiiirl — you’re all that a bag o’ chips. You’re a real bitch, not one of them wannabes. You’re a workin’, sleepin’, cravin’, hurtin’, suckin’-it-up-and-makin’-it-work bitch. You could even be head bitch if I got iced. 😉
Babe, I love ya. And God knows shit happens and can bury a bitch. Not to be smart, but grit yo’ chomps and stick through it. You’re tough — you know this. And I’m here with my mini-skirt, pompoms, and ditzy enthusiasm to cheer you on.
Go, bitch, go!
“You could even be head bitch if I got iced” made me snort coffee out. My. Nose. OMFG YOU SO FUNNY! -m
Mush- give yourself a break. Please. -gregg
Aw. Okay. *smooch* -m
Aw Mush – I’m so sorry about all of this.
I know it doesn’t help, but I’m totally jealous that you picked up spinning/drafting so quickly. I stink at it.
I think the secret is total indifference, like, “Okay, yarn, I really don’t care HOW you turn out, I’m just doing this for fun!” It seems to make it want to like you better. Maybe cats love yarn for a reason: they both love to be ignored! 😉 -m
I think you are incredibly brave for sharing what you have shared. Your heart is broken and yet you’re still here sharing your soul for all the world to see. If it was me, I’d be in my bed with the covers pulled over my head for a month or more. Some emotions are private and believe me, all of us reading your blog understand that. You don’t have to write about every little thing for us to know that this is a horrible time for you. We can read between the lines. You’ve got a huge reader base because no matter what you blog about, it’s always interesting. It pulls you in and makes you want to know more. I started reading your blog by accident….I didn’t know you, but I find myself checking your blog every day. It’s like reality TV without the sensors!!
Don’t be so hard on yourself. 10,000 hits makes you an internet superstar!
Rufus
Aw hell. Y’all are being so nice to me! I feel like a superstar! *smooch* -m
I think it is mature and sensible that you’re not portraying Bread as an ogre. Clearly you both want different things out of life, and neither of you can be the other’s ideal partner in achieving those goals. There may be a certain satisfaction in venting about Bread that casts him in a bad light, but, in all likelihood, that will only make the breakup even rougher.
Thank you. -m
Sorry to hear about all this. Just got to catch up on what’s been going on, and there’s nothing I can say really. What you wrote wasn’t lame, silly. Gotta say I admire your courage in actually writing about all these. Your previous posts didn’t suck. It was showing honesty, which I think I like about blogs. It showed your human side Mush, that hey I’m human and not above all this. That your life isn’t all rainbows and butterflies and you hurt just like everybody else.
Well with that much hits, you’re a blog superstar in your own rights ya know.
I’m sure things will get better. It’ll just take time but everything is going to be alright. I feel in awe reading about these kind of things sometimes. I feel like a spectator watching you from the sidelines. I can feel your pain, or get an idea of it but would have to let you be on your own devices to make it through the game. All I can say is that What can we do to help?
It’s nice that you haven’t turned bitter and casts all the blame to B. And that you have friends to support you, and a brother that loves you. Aw heck, not trying to be mush-y but us readers love you too.
Take care Mush.
Mush-y. Hehe. 😉 -m
You’re SO totally worth 10,000 hits a month. Many more, actually. You deserve so much more of my time right now and I seem to be having my own little meltdown. As always babe, a big ‘ol southern smoochie to you!
A southern meltdown! Hot! *smooch* -m